Life is always changing. We are always changing (even if the changes are very subtle). Everything around us changes- weather, the leaves, people, our children, jobs, all of it! Sometimes these changes are a blessing, sometimes they take us for an emotional ride, sometimes they roll right on by unnoticed by anyone. Sometimes they do all three just like they did for Trish (read below for her story). This year brought about a large number of changes for me. At first they were pretty painful- people misperceiving who I was and the loss of a close friendship. I kept clinging to what I thought was supposed to happen. I kept clinging to who I thought I was and how I felt others should be reacting to or treating me.Little did I know that these changes were providing the most optimal training ground for me personally. I was just getting to a healthy place of forgiveness and letting go and then another incident occurred that took me for a big roller coaster of emotions to show me I hadn’t quite learned my lesson. It was a week later that I left for Kripalu for 10 days of Yin Yoga and Mindfulness Training. My intention was to let go of the hurt that was clouding my vision of myself and others. I went with open eyes ready to see, hear and experience as much as I could.
After a few days, Sarah (my teacher) made this statement, “We need to investigate with interest pain and change. When we are in pain we try to control it, avoid it or get rid of it. When change comes, whether by force or choice, the way we relate to change causes us to suffer. Not the change itself.” It was one of those “a-ha” moments for me. I had been expecting my friendships and relationships to stay unchanged no matter what. I was grasping and clinging to what I thought was true. I realized at that moment that change is inevitable. My heart softened and I saw more clearly my role in holding on too tightly and not wanting life to change.This thought keeps coming back to me daily. Everything is subject to change. As I have spent more time in meditation and in yoga practice investigating my relationship to change, I notice I am not rocked and rolled every time a change occurs. Lately when anything comes up that starts to set my emotional wheels turning, I take a breath and see it is really the nature of life. I loosen my hold and let go to see just what happens. Now I feel I can ride the waves of life’s transitions a little more smoothly.
They say the only thing constant in life is change. So why not open to the changes and know that every occurrence, every situation is optimal for our growth? Embrace the changes (good or bad), view them without holding so tightly to your own agenda and enjoy each day a little more knowing you can survive the shifts and maybe even grow in the mean time.