For the past week, I have been in pity mode. No need to go into the details, but I couldn’t snap out of it. I felt like every button I have was being pushed- children, spouse, yoga studio, illness of family member, people asking more of me than I could give. Every decision I made in the last three months was held high in my face, as if saying, “Are you sure you can pull this off?”
Finally, yesterday at the height of my pity party, I quit. I sat down in the chair and watched two episodes of my favorite show (a guilty pleasure). In those moments of surrender, I realized how silly I was being. This was fear rearing its ugly head, disguised as self-pity and sorrow. I stopped, leaned into the fear for a moment and then made a decision change my course and my point of view. I was amazed at how quickly I was able to reset my emotions and actions. I gathered the kids together and we went and worked like a family to get our new yoga school cleaned, beautiful, and ready to open. Claire and Henry even had some fun (and chaos) along the way.
The lesson I learned is this… I am still human, I am going to sulk, pout and act like a two-year old on some occasions. Not pretty! All I can do is be patient with myself and know when to “hit the reset button.” (Thank you Karen for that expression.)