How much of our lives is spent in our own head? This is where we create our reality. Reality is truly what you make of it… nothing more, nothing less. Recently, when I spent some time with women friends, I realized how many of us spoke negatively of ourselves. When with other friends, I realized how many of them replayed negative events over and over and did not remember the positive ones with as much clarity. Part of mindfulness is being aware of your internal dialogue and what it tells you. You can begin to shift your internal dialogue and create a much larger view of yourself, your past, your reality. The following from Judith Lasater’s Living Your Yoga: Finding the Spiritual in Everyday Life, sums it up quite nicely:
A crucial and perhaps most powerful aspect of your relationship with yourself is your internal dialogue. This is true for at least three reasons. First, how you talk to yourself reflects your thinking, which may not be truly reflective of reality. Second, it may be repeated for years, thus becoming embedded in your consciousness. Finally, it exists in the silence of your mind, unchallenged by the thoughts of others.
For the next week, document your internal dialogue. Notice how many times you tell yourself you aren’t good enough, pretty enough. Notice how many times you tell yourself you know better than everyone else or how great you are. (We tend to self-depricate or inflate the ego. Notice which you tend to do.) Document this dialogue with compassion. As you notice, don’t criticize. Just notice and begin to shift it. When a dialogue pops up, take a breath, let it go.