Boundaries Versus Armor

Boundaries Versus Armor

Boundaries Versus Armor

In my teaching and learning, my teacher has often asked us to remove our armor or envision our closest friends removing our armor for us.  I find this metaphor so beautiful and moving. However, I often get stuck between boundaries and armor.  Boundaries are a good thing; they keep us from being a doormat.  Armor is not a good thing, it keeps us from connection.  I think I struggle with finding the balance between boundaries and armor.  How do you know which is which in your daily life?  Is it years of boundaries that are never respected which then turns into armor?  I always thought this was okay until I heard and read Brene Brown’s research– if we numb ourselves to the bad, we are numbing ourselves to the good as well.  Is armor just another way to numb yourself to a person who has treated you in an unkind way?  I know for me it is easy to put up the shields for protection once I have been hurt, but am I preventing myself from loving with my whole heart?  How do you know the difference between boundaries and armor in your self?

Any wisdom and insight or random thoughts would be greatly appreciated.

ABOUT AUTHOR

Elizabeth Delaney